Top Ten Number One Google Search Strings

In my ongoing quest to burn as much jet fuel as possible during the making of an environmentally sensitive documentary series I leave shortly for inner mongolia. My short stay in New York has been quiet except for some excellent news which it may, unfortunately, be a bit premature to share. Having bled antarctica dry I have little to report, so this seems a perfect opportunity to indulge in the narcissism that plagues all bloggers, who sit typing away and blasting missives off into the void of the web.

Like all such self-involved bloggers, I have, buried in the background code of antarcticiana, a counter to collect data on the vast multitudes of visitors who grace these pages. These statistics I check with an unhealthy obsessiveness. Beyond a simple count of the multitudes, all sorts of fascinating information is to be had from parsing the figures. (I have so far had visitors from 47 countries, for instance). Most interesting, or perhaps most amusing, is that my counter provides a referral url. Although many good friends have links to antarcticiana, the vast majority of these referrals come from Google. I am in a position to tell you, from my personal statistical analysis, that a maximum of 1% of internet searches are done on all other search engines combined. With a 99% market share, no wonder Google stock is up in the stratosphere despite the dot com bomb.

Most of those who are looking for me find me by searching for "brooklynite on the ice," "brooklyn antarctica," "frozen richard," and so on. But it is those who stumble upon these pages by accident who provide the most interesting food for thought. By far the next most common search which reaches me is one for "unused band names." At least once a day some poor uncreative musician desperate for a catchy name for their power trio washes up here, only to discover that my solution to their dilemma was "The Cicada Husk Trilogy." In some cases the information people hope to obtain with their search is obvious; in others I am left scratching my head wondering what they could possibly have wished to uncover with their selection of terms. In many the combinations of words seem odd and improbable, until I remember that I must have used something resembling them, for if not the search would not have found me. Sometimes I remember immediately what it was that I wrote to seduce Google into heading my way, but in others I'm tempted to repeat the search.

The following selection is guaranteed accurate to the letter. In most cases antarcticiana was the #1 hit for the search at the time it appeared in my statistics, and in all cases was in the top ten of returned results. Enjoy, and if any of you are responsible for any of these searches, my apologies for exposing you.


"fresh ox gall" live

is there anything good in antarctica

pierced fanny

brain teaser if a boulder is taken out of a canoe, does the water level rise or fall?

superglue on hands and treatment

People who have survived deserted islands

guidi boots brad pitt

fish names slime head toothfish

female armpit stains photos

arctic bamboo

how many feet does a cassowary have

horrible weather of march 2007

fly agaric christmas cards eBay

"black rock" herb erection aid

spine tailed iguana

what is the 'Pecten'?

festooned means

Belize Politician caught by candid camera.

literary coincidences

deep in between thighs photo

picture + "mobile home on Stilts"

farthest reach of penguins